Friday 5 December 2008

Letter of complaint

Kim Parker
Kingston Road 98
900-961 Los Angeles

4th December 2008


BBC Complaints
PO Box 1922
Glasgow
G2 3WT




Dear BBC TEAM,

Letter of complaint

I’m writing to you because the way how women are presented in your advertisements is really discriminatory. Since the last few weeks I noticed that such discriminatory advertisements are more often. In general advertisements are really manipulative and so I think young people are under a big pressure, mainly young girls, because of the image which is presented of women in this advertisement. They have all a perfect body with no blemishes, and girls who see that also want to be like these flawless girls in the TV. It is also a problem that women are in the spot often naked but men aren’t. This image is not what I expect that should be shown in the commercials. I know that you can’t forbid making such commercials, but you can stop to show it on your television transmitter. That would be a beginning of a change to make the world better. Because young people have a big dream, they want to be perfect, but this is an illusion, and we should start to change this dream.
To sum up I hope you take this letter seriously, because for me it is a big request that women should not presented with this image in your advertise. Women are more than only sex symbols and I also hope that you have the same view.



Yours sincerely,
Kim

1 comment:

Guenter said...

Correct letter format. Instead of 'letter of complaint" you could also be more specific: 'Complaint about the presentation of women in commercials'.
There has to be a break between introduction and main part of the letter.

since + point in time / for + period of time --> present perfect!
they are more frequent
advertisement, advertising (Reklame), to advertise, commercial (on TV!)
exp: "this advertisement. " --> those kinds of advertisements
grammar: those flawless girls
exp: on TV, on the radio / on the air
structure: "that women are in the spot often naked but men aren’t"
structure: I expect to be shown ...
grammar: to show them ... (there was a plural before!)
exp: "television transmitter" ??? --> channel
the beginning of a change
women should not be presented (passive!)

Partly quite good, partly there are expression and grammar problems.